Drunken Mouth Syndrome

Once in a while I have this little issue when it comes to speaking. It’s like every other word that wants to push past my lips comes out wrong. It either comes out backwards or jumbled in an incoherent mumble. I even have on occasion when I talk, find myself missing a word or two out of a sentence that I totally meant to say. Thankfully this problem doesn’t happen all the time, but it does seem to come and go in phases. Maybe I should someday look into it further on an actual medical side of things, but in the mean time I’ve simply diagnosed myself with having, drunken mouth syndrome.

Is this a real condition? Not as far as I know, but it’s what I’ve concluded for myself. It’s like the mouth gets drunk and forgets how to work. The rest of me is 100% perfectly sober and coherent when this happens. I don’t know really how else to describe my occasional lacking of verbal skills. The kicker though in my self-diagnoses is that I don’t even drink. Granted, I’ve enjoyed alcoholic beverages in the past – but it’s been so long now, that I can’t even remember the last time I drank anything with even a drop of something alcoholic in it! So of course, this clearly means my own diagnosis probably is quite far from inaccuracy. I mean, aside from the fact I made it up.

--XOXO, Jane